Good morning cross watcher!!! How's your first week of the new month? Are you content? Are you in good health? Do you have any plans for the rest of the month? Don't forget to stay busy and to not lose sight of your goals, you can conquer anything if you put your mind into it. I know you have love and support from everyone around you whether they tell you or not, I just wanted to let you know that I believe in you as well in case you lose focus. I figured one more person to give you confidence couldn’t hurt, right? Keep your head up and know that I have your back, you got this. I know I started doing some links on Wednesdays as well but I have been low in spirits lately, I did not want to speak to you if I was down in the dumps. I didn’t want you to feel the same way as I did so I waited a little longer, moments of emptiness and loneliness without really knowing what triggered it. I’m the one that’s supposed to uplift you and not the other way around but we’ll get to that later.
Did you like “memorial”? It was a lot to take in, wasn’t it? I meant everything that I said in that entry, as I do enjoy writing these links. Would you be interested in more REVIVALS like I did on “heckler”? I honestly can’t recall what drove me to write that entry but I do know that I was not at a good place at the time when I wrote the second half of that entry (the one in July), I was considering revealing another strong REVIVAL that was written 2 days prior to the second half of “heckler”. Did you know that “the crowd” is exactly 1000 words? That entry was very difficult to write because it spoke about betrayal and true colors from the people you didn’t expect, it’s a very ”hear no evil” kind of situation you would hate to be in. The working title for that entry was actually called ”wolf” as a play on ”The Boy who cried Wolf”, indicating that it wasn't how it was supposed to be. Writing that and “the reply” back to back honestly mentally drained me, even though I was relieved to finish “the reply” I also became a little down knowing she might not ever read it (or care to). I’m not going to lie though, it did feel good to hear her voice again during the research on the voice memo she sent. I was honestly embarrassed to post “thursdays” because it was showing me being bitter and at my worst, I never plan to write like that ever again. Did you also know that it was also my 85th entry? Same number as the year I was born (hence the last sentence), I know you think I’m slick but I’m not. I wouldn’t call it writer’s block but I was honestly stuck with my emotions to come up with something meaningful, that’s why I dug up “perfaults” because it was similar to what I was feeling today. Just stuck feeling like an absolute mess, another fun fact is that “perfaults” was written on the same day as the first half of “heckler”. I guess you could see where it makes sense, but let’s move forward.
So why did I call this “the crawl”? I actually got the name from a song from a musician that I like (and worked with once before), it also best describes what’s been going on. It started earlier this week when I was started feeling sluggish and unmotivated where it felt like a struggle just to stay positive, lately, it’s been feeling like my efforts to stay enthusiastic have been failing. For the past five months, I’ve been a little more to myself ever since the split but for the past week I’ve been a little more reserved more than ever, been wanting to be alone and I’m terrified to reach out for company. Nothing fills my heart more with joy than making other people happy, it's not cutting it for me right now because I’m not making myself happy. I know I should speak more about this but I don’t want to bombard you with more of these thoughts, I know I said that the next “link up” would be better and I failed on my word so I’d rather stop right here if that’s okay with you. Thank you for listening, please take care of yourself. Until we link again, here’s another one for you. A little dark and moody but you get the point.
Did you like “memorial”? It was a lot to take in, wasn’t it? I meant everything that I said in that entry, as I do enjoy writing these links. Would you be interested in more REVIVALS like I did on “heckler”? I honestly can’t recall what drove me to write that entry but I do know that I was not at a good place at the time when I wrote the second half of that entry (the one in July), I was considering revealing another strong REVIVAL that was written 2 days prior to the second half of “heckler”. Did you know that “the crowd” is exactly 1000 words? That entry was very difficult to write because it spoke about betrayal and true colors from the people you didn’t expect, it’s a very ”hear no evil” kind of situation you would hate to be in. The working title for that entry was actually called ”wolf” as a play on ”The Boy who cried Wolf”, indicating that it wasn't how it was supposed to be. Writing that and “the reply” back to back honestly mentally drained me, even though I was relieved to finish “the reply” I also became a little down knowing she might not ever read it (or care to). I’m not going to lie though, it did feel good to hear her voice again during the research on the voice memo she sent. I was honestly embarrassed to post “thursdays” because it was showing me being bitter and at my worst, I never plan to write like that ever again. Did you also know that it was also my 85th entry? Same number as the year I was born (hence the last sentence), I know you think I’m slick but I’m not. I wouldn’t call it writer’s block but I was honestly stuck with my emotions to come up with something meaningful, that’s why I dug up “perfaults” because it was similar to what I was feeling today. Just stuck feeling like an absolute mess, another fun fact is that “perfaults” was written on the same day as the first half of “heckler”. I guess you could see where it makes sense, but let’s move forward.
So why did I call this “the crawl”? I actually got the name from a song from a musician that I like (and worked with once before), it also best describes what’s been going on. It started earlier this week when I was started feeling sluggish and unmotivated where it felt like a struggle just to stay positive, lately, it’s been feeling like my efforts to stay enthusiastic have been failing. For the past five months, I’ve been a little more to myself ever since the split but for the past week I’ve been a little more reserved more than ever, been wanting to be alone and I’m terrified to reach out for company. Nothing fills my heart more with joy than making other people happy, it's not cutting it for me right now because I’m not making myself happy. I know I should speak more about this but I don’t want to bombard you with more of these thoughts, I know I said that the next “link up” would be better and I failed on my word so I’d rather stop right here if that’s okay with you. Thank you for listening, please take care of yourself. Until we link again, here’s another one for you. A little dark and moody but you get the point.
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