Whenever I try to help my friend and his lady come to terms every time they fight because they’re too stubborn to think outside the box, I use “the finish line” method with them (I mentioned this before in “talk to me”). “the finish line” method is when I tell them that I’m trying to reach the goal but I can’t get there without them because this is a team effort, even if we have to walk or crawl our way there I don’t mind as long as we make it to the finish line together. This is something I wish I did on the last efforts with my best friend because we were so close to the finish line before she ultimately retired from the race. I regret letting the weight of our problems escalate to the point that it seemed pointless to continue to even finish, I was trying to stay strong for the both of us and kept going with the weight of the world still strolling along but when I looked back as I got close to the finish line I realized she was gone. I accumulated everything with no immediate regard on telling her how I felt about everything that went south, I was afraid of saying anything to discourage her from continuing the race but she retired anyway. This was a mistake that I made with the person I wanted in my tomorrows because I refused to believe that we were in a slump, a mistake I won’t make for my friend and his lady that seems to work. Seeing their progress makes me wish I tried harder with my potentials because the prize was right in front of us.
I asked a friend of mine if he believed in rough patches in a relationship and he said “absolutely not!”, my first thought was that I was talking to the wrong person but it made me question why I do believe in them. I believe in rough patches (sometimes) because I believe that communication is the key for any relationship to work and that lack of communication can cause any relationship to deteriorate with no proper conclusions, if two people really care about each other they will do what they can to get out of whatever situation they are in (but they have to be willing). This is not to suggest to start fights or arguments with someone that you care about but the mending of any conflict is the greatest reward for anybody that thought they weren’t going to make it, it gives you the belief that we can conquer anything if we stick together. No relationship is ever perfect, there will be bumpy roads and detours along the way but as long as you get to whom you want to be at the end then that’s all that matters because the prize is right in front of us.
My best friend did suggest that we should consider going to therapy when we were at our boiling point, I guess you could consider this after we were starting to tumble during the last stretch. I declined the suggestion because not only was I angry at the time but I saw us getting near where I wanted us to be, I figured if we held on a little longer we would make it because she would have my back no matter how bad I wanted to reach that goal. I just needed her to trust me at that moment but perhaps I failed to see how serious the situations were at hand because I knew deep down we would make it. I just didn't consider if she had the will to keep going and that’s my fault because the prize was next to me the whole time, it was her the whole time.
The title came from something my mother said sometime last year stating how “People shouldn’t get married if they don’t take their vows seriously”. She was talking about her failed marriage with my father believe it or not.
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