cerebral implosion

   Work, friends, money, and family.  These are the 4 things that help us maintain our everyday lives, and these are also the 4 things to brings out the best and the worst in us.  The great thing about these 4 things is that we could lean on one when the others fall short on us.  If money is short we always have our family, if we have a hard day at work then we always have our friends (etc. etc.).  You really can’t have one without the other which is the beautiful thing about it, but what if life gets the best of you and you don’t know who to point the finger to?

   The best way I could explain is how I said it to my therapist, and they might use this method with their other clients (patent pending).  I call it “Mental Jenga”.  Imagine 4 aspects of your life (work, friends, money, and family) were playing YOUR game of Jenga, and each aspect is just pulling the pieces out bit by bit adding to the top layer hoping it wouldn’t fall on them.  And imagine those pieces were your emotions and the more they keep adding to the top, the more unbalanced you’re becoming.  So they’re building and building and the tower is looking like it’s ready to fall, another one is pulled and nothing drops.  One more is pulled and it all falls on one of the aspects, now all the annoyances and frustration from the other 3 aspects are relieved because all the weight goes to that one aspect of who the pieces fell on.  Now you get to witness the wrath of someone else’s fury, that wasn’t necessarily meant for you.

   Displacement is a practice that I am ashamed to admit that I’ve done for years, and I’m thankful that I stopped this unhealthy release a few years ago.  But I still see it commonly practiced within my workplace, people that I care dearly about, and a lot of it on social media.  I’ve seen it personally a few times this year with me, and instead of seeing if you might be the problem that you’re reflecting onto someone else.. you point the finger at the person that has an issue with you.  I’ve lost friendships for this very same reason, and to this day they have not stepped forward to admit their faults.  One of my biggest problems with that is I take it personally, if someone is having a bad day and they take it out on me I repel it back to them knowing I don’t deserve it (as opposed to letting them vent). THUS, one of the many reasons I still stand by “the oath”.