t.i.c.k. (the inner cognitions of kaiography)

    It started on a Sunday afternoon when a friend wanted to have dinner in Downtown LA outside of a market, I was picking up random beverages to see what I wanted to go with my meal and I finally selected one after touching about 6 glasses of different juices. The following day I just went to work and came straight back home, same with that Tuesday. But Wednesday I woke up with something in my throat and it was painful to cough, on top of that I noticed that my body started to ache. Since it was the 10th anniversary of my father’s passing I watched Disney’s “Onward” in his honor but I noticed that I wasn’t feeling too hot, I still went to Santa Monica Pier to watch the sunset also in his honor but I noticed that I was starting to feel worse. I usually stay to watch the clouds turn to that beautiful California fuchsia but as soon as the sun was setting I immediately left, the ride home was even more torturous where I couldn’t wait to lay down on my bed. I spent my Thursday lay...

    On the 11th anniversary of my father’s passing, I had a difficult time staying asleep so I decided to stop by the pier to catch the moon touching the water, but when I got there the fog consumed the moon before the sun could arrive. I did manage to stay long enough to watch the sky change colors since the sun was covered by the fog, I was able to witness the birds catching their morning flight stretching their wings as well. On the way back home while I was trying to connect to the next transit, I witness a girl dressed all in black with green hair talking to herself and yelling at bystanders crossing by. I didn’t think much of it until she slapped an older Latina on her right shoulder for no reason, I saw her immediately reaching into her bag ready to arm herself with mace and I walked up to her to say: “Are you okay? Stick by me and nothing will happen to you”. As we boarded the green-haired girl got on before us but nothing was said, I sat across from the Latina as she ...

  What if a new purpose you chose to pursue in life to improve your mental health was seen as a curse to some around you, it’s questions like this that keep me up at night.   Sometimes I have to ask myself if I'm living a lie because nobody believes in me or if I'm seeing a bigger picture that others refuse to acknowledge, more than 2 years strong I'm still convinced that this is the right path for me to continue in my life.   Ever since I took the oath to not become angry or reactive towards others, I could count with one hand the times I've snapped at someone since then which confirms that I've vastly improved in not responding to situations I cannot control.   Unfortunately, doing so made me lose the women closest to me.   Refusing to fight back or respond to their aggressive behavior might've been seen to them as cowardly or downright pathetic, but since when has trying to return to a situation with a clear head vowed as not being responsible?  ...