link: penultima

   Good evening cross watcher! Long time no talk, I hope you’re doing all right. I’ve been all right (more or less), I was very sick from the virus for my birthday but I’m thankful to be alive and well today. How about you? I hope you’re well, I hope this new year is treating you well so far. I hope you have goals and looking forward to a brand new start in life, just know that the world is in your hands and nothing can take it away from you (unless you let it). I’m writing to you today to tell you that since you are my only viewer, I’ve decided to close this chapter in my life until further notice. I didn’t like having to speak negatively all the time, this was an unhealthy habit that made me close my previous blog and I caught myself doing it again now. It isn’t fair to you and it isn’t fair to me, I’m not an unhappy person because I’ve had plenty of moments that brought a smile to my face but I won't discuss it (I do the opposite with this blog). Maybe I might come back to this blog in the future but this is a clutch I need to let go of, for now, I hope you understand.  

  These are the names of some of the entries I never finished: unlucky number (COVID-19 reveal), her black dress (about a date that never happened), atelophobia (fear of not being good enough), less (alternate “atelophobia” name), celebrate alone (accomplishments entry), isoLAted (about LA being deserted from COVID-19), face values (middleman entry), cocoon (don’t recall, only had a title), the mask (don’t recall either, only had a title too), no words (same), untitled hydro entry, untitled embracing entry, the first year (entry about grief), worth fighting for (I forgot this one too), the 2 4’s (forgive & forget), and that’s pretty much it. Everything mentioned was from the span of two September’s, just gave up or never had the heart to finish them… or even start them. There’s a couple I wish I did but in the end, I’m thankful I didn’t.

   Before I end this chapter, I want to thank you for listening to me for as long (or short) that you did. It meant a lot to me that someone viewed, sometimes I wish I knew who you were but at the same time it’s better if I didn’t know. I wish you the best in your upcoming journey, I hope things work out for you in the end and know that I will always believe in you. Thank you for everything, until I sign on again… Take care.