the deleted playlist

  It was a couple of nights ago just after dawn when my mother and I heard a crash without knowing where it came from, it sounded like it came from downstairs and I checked within the house to see anything broken or out of place and found nothing. It wasn’t until the next day where my mother told me where she thinks what that noise was, there was a stack of vinyl records on the ground just laying out in our garage floor behind a hidden place. Many of them were sealed so I couldn’t do a throughout check to see if anything was cracked or damaged, but they looked fine for the most part. As to why those vinyl were there, they were placed there about a year ago after I had my heart broken from a team of artists who told me that I was no longer welcomed to work with them anymore, the sight of their work and sounds of their sophisticated music made me feel defeated as a person, artist, and friend that I had to remove their material from my room and iPod. All the records that I had purchased of them whether it was used, signed or sealed I couldn’t bring myself to be okay with being apart from them at the time and since then I haven’t heard any of their music in over a year and I’m not sure if I miss their music or not, but I do have moments where I miss them and how happy they were to show me any new material that they just finished. It was amazing seeing the process between the roughs of the recordings to the finished product and I supported them by not only downloading their material but also buying the records who I could hear how it’s supposed to be heard, it was amazing witnessing all that to the end.

  Is it time for me to revisit their music? Maybe. There was never any anger when we were bumping heads, just lots of disappointment and hurt feelings due to their lack of understanding. When I thought about removing some records to make room for more at the time their material was the first to go, was it selfish? Probably. It bothers me because associates of theirs that always respected me have been making big moves within the team as well and I didn’t even give these up and coming artists a chance but I’ve been proud of them ever since, just couldn’t bring myself to listen to it. But I think I might be ready now, I’m not sure if I’m willing to start my relationship over with them but I think I’m willing to become a fan of their music once more. Deep down I know they miss me because I still catch them checking up on my social media every once in a while, probably wondering what I might be up to… or how I might’ve liked something that they just released. Either way, I’ll give it a listen. It’s been a while.