I used to have very strong feelings for a girl named Moon Maroon.
She always wore maroon, but she was as cold as the night.
I don't think she really acknowledged how I felt about her, or put herself in my shoes.
I know she had feelings for me somewhere, but kept herself distant from me by having unbelievable standards.
I would watch her throughout high school and to this current day, but she wasn't the type of person to think twice about me.
I don't know why I would be around her cruelty, displacements, and ignorance towards me, maybe because this was the closest I've ever had to love?
I seriously thought it was meant to be and I could be who I am, but it seems like who I am was too "dark" for her.
I finally realized that I needed to distance myself away from her, but she wanted me to stick around?
For what? So I could be her sponge? Her punching bag? Her back-up? Did she really think that I would always be there? And be there for her?
I need to depart myself away from her, but it's so hard. What is it that I need from her?
Maybe I thought all the misbehavior would've changed at the end for the better, I feel like a fool for tolerating her madness.
When I told her that I couldn't be around her anymore, she began to cry.
But why? She told me that I was her rock. Then why did you always throw me around?
And this has been the hardest time I've ever faced, I wonder what she's thinking about.
I really want to know what's on her mind, I hope she's ok.
I colored my hair Maroon to represent the fact that the feelings I have for her are fading away by the day, but she will be remembered.
I hope one day you will realize what will make you happy, and the thing to make you happy with me. But you would just deny it. Don't be afraid.
Even if I don't make you happy, I still want you to smile.
This entry isn't about me, but it's to show someone else that I know how they're feeling.
__________________________________
This was posted on 3/23/06 on my old blog.
Notes
1. Not the original photo, but one I found from the archives in recent years.
2. This was written for a friend after he and his long time girlfriend broke up.
3. The line "I colored my hair Maroon" stemmed from me wearing a friend's red wig on a random trip to an arcade, my friend's ex-girlfriend at the time always colored her hair red. That part is very true.
4. This entry was heavily rewritten, typos galore.
She always wore maroon, but she was as cold as the night.
I don't think she really acknowledged how I felt about her, or put herself in my shoes.
I know she had feelings for me somewhere, but kept herself distant from me by having unbelievable standards.
I would watch her throughout high school and to this current day, but she wasn't the type of person to think twice about me.
I don't know why I would be around her cruelty, displacements, and ignorance towards me, maybe because this was the closest I've ever had to love?
I seriously thought it was meant to be and I could be who I am, but it seems like who I am was too "dark" for her.
I finally realized that I needed to distance myself away from her, but she wanted me to stick around?
For what? So I could be her sponge? Her punching bag? Her back-up? Did she really think that I would always be there? And be there for her?
I need to depart myself away from her, but it's so hard. What is it that I need from her?
Maybe I thought all the misbehavior would've changed at the end for the better, I feel like a fool for tolerating her madness.
When I told her that I couldn't be around her anymore, she began to cry.
But why? She told me that I was her rock. Then why did you always throw me around?
And this has been the hardest time I've ever faced, I wonder what she's thinking about.
I really want to know what's on her mind, I hope she's ok.
I colored my hair Maroon to represent the fact that the feelings I have for her are fading away by the day, but she will be remembered.
I hope one day you will realize what will make you happy, and the thing to make you happy with me. But you would just deny it. Don't be afraid.
Even if I don't make you happy, I still want you to smile.
This entry isn't about me, but it's to show someone else that I know how they're feeling.
__________________________________
This was posted on 3/23/06 on my old blog.
Notes
1. Not the original photo, but one I found from the archives in recent years.
2. This was written for a friend after he and his long time girlfriend broke up.
3. The line "I colored my hair Maroon" stemmed from me wearing a friend's red wig on a random trip to an arcade, my friend's ex-girlfriend at the time always colored her hair red. That part is very true.
4. This entry was heavily rewritten, typos galore.
Comments
Post a Comment