as the crow flies

  One of the hardest things to do for some people is knowing how to listen, and not just knowing how to listen but the willingness to understand what the other person is saying to them. I kind of pride myself on being the ear that most people need when they have to vent, I respect them for being open enough to unveil something to me because I know how hard it is for some people to even open up about anything. Gaining their trust is one thing but for them to be taken seriously with their words is another, and with that trust I hope they trust me with the words I can provide for them to help them with whichever situation they’re in. I tend to be the voice of reason for a lot of people that I know, I do this because I wish I had one for myself. I know this sounds very random and out of the blue, but let me give you a situation on why I’m speaking like this.

  There was an incident that occurred between my childhood friend and his lady, thankfully and unfortunately I was there as the argument ensued between them. The reason for the argument wasn’t important, the problem was that they kept interrupting each other which made the next person speak even louder. And the louder they became, the less they wanted to listen. I had to intervene the both of them to not only address the issue but also to point out what they were doing to each other wasn’t helping the situation at all. I could’ve let them argue because the argument was none of my business, or I could have pointed out the faults in the resolution being neglected which is what I chose to do. I calmly said to them both that when one of them speaks the other has to listen without interrupting them, because the more one was interrupted the more angrier the other becomes because their point wasn’t addressed and it would be rerouted into another issue. I stood there to make sure that the next person had something to say without being interrupted, and that happened to clear the air a lot more. They both thanked me at the end, but I wanted to speak to his lady alone on my ride home to clarify something. I know she tends to get emotionally riled up whenever she’s not heard and it causes him to do the same, so I asked her something on my way home. If you knew we were going in a particular direction with someone else, would it annoy you to constantly take a detour somewhere else? If you know that you’re trying to go from point A to point B but I keep misdirecting you up to point G, wouldn’t you be tired to go back to point B? Sounds confusing but I hope you get the point because she did and she thanked me for that talk.

  I don’t hate a lot of things in life, but one thing I do hate is being interrupted while I’m speaking. Even if it’s something I don’t want to hear, I still give them a chance to finish what they have to say. I have been guilty of doing that a few times here and there, has your therapist ever interrupted you while you were speaking? Hardly. The opposing party needs to get their point addressed, you don’t want to cut them off and get them sidetracked into something another issue.  And by that happening issues not relating to the initial argument will pile up into a series of unresolved events, and that only leads to you trying to recall why the fight happened in the first place.  Keep it short, keep it minimal, it probably wasn’t worth arguing in the first place, hear them out.

  As far as the title goes: “as the crow flies” is another way of saying “in a straight line”, even though I found the phrase by accident I liked it so much that I didn’t want to lose it. This crow has nothing to do with this entry (even though I shot it myself), but shooting this reminded me that I needed to finish this story.